I was given some fabric several years ago; random amounts and types. It was one of those times someone stumbled upon stacks of fabric, from their grandmother or mother, in their attic and asked if I wanted it. Yes, this is a thing. It’s happened multiple times. I used to not know how to say no and I’d end up with piles of fabric I really didn’t want. In this situation I actually ended up with some fabrics I liked; I just didn’t know what I was going to do with them. I typically pick out my pattern first and then pick out my fabric. Most of these fabrics are still currently sitting in my closet. I’ve got a few ideas for some of them, but most have just been there waiting patiently for me. One of these fabrics was the white rib knit I used for my axis tank and median knickers. I could not have been happier to remember I had this fabric in my stash.
This was my second axis tank to make and my first median knickers. There were a few hiccups with the axis tank. Because I was given this fabric, I didn’t have a full yard. To be honest, I’m not sure how much I had. All I knew was that I was going to make it work. I had this vision in my head for a cozy, knit pj set and I was not going to let the lack of fabric stop me. The lack of fabric was a problem though. I didn’t check to see if it stretched both ways and I didn’t put the hem band in the direction of the greatest stretch. I was somehow able to get the hem band sewn on, but when I went to slip into my beautiful axis tank, it would not stretch for me. No matter what I did, I could not get into it. I finally decided to cut the hem off (the thread and fabric both being white and using a three-step zig zag stitch made it extremely difficult to pull out the stitches) and use the fold over elastic I was using on the median knickers as my hem band. The tank ended up being shorter than I wanted it, but it’s still cozy.
My favorite part was honestly making the knickers. Sewing the crotch was challenging and so fun! I was terrified I had messed everything up once I had sewn it together, but when I turned it right side out, it looked perfect! At least perfect to me. I was so proud of myself and thankful I didn’t have to unstitch anything. This was a project that got me excited to keep sewing. Even though there were issues with the axis tank, overall I was encouraged by my work. I’ve already purchased two more rib knits so I can have three of these sets. I’m not sure why I want three, but that’s what I want. I’ll be making them with hunter green and light blue rib knits. Stay tuned.
Now let’s talk body image. When I posted my original post on Instagram about this make, I sat there for a good bit pondering if it was okay to show this much skin. I laughed at how I’ve posted pictures in my bathing suit that reveal more and yet was anxious to post this simply because it’s like underwear. I was also frustrated (aka deep anger I’m slowly learning to express and release but is currently revealing itself as frustration) that I had been conditioned to feel so much shame around my body. I posted this make in the classiest way I knew how, while still showing what I made. I respect myself enough to only reveal what I want to reveal (which might be less or more than you want to reveal) but I also love my body in a way I never have, and I no longer feel shame in letting her be seen. For anyone out there who needs to hear this: your body isn’t bad. It’s beautiful and glorious, just as it is in this very moment. It wasn’t meant to be hidden – especially if the one you keep hiding it from is yourself.
Sending you all cozy love.